Capricorn 1

I'm just a simple Highlander guy
With various writes I so love to try
     From nature to passion
     Fantasy is my true fashion
I thank the Soup to let me apply


Catsuited and Cute

She stands in Lycra so black
What she shows there is no lack
     Her most beautiful curves   
     Better close my eyes to preserve
Before I suffer a heart attack

The Blond's Blinds

In the shower one day was a blond
The door bell rang, she went to respond
     She shouted "who's there?"
    "It's the blind man" he declares
"Hold on, I'll open the door to correspond"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Seconds later she opens the door
"Nice breasts" he says, as she looks to the floor
     "Here are the blinds you requested
      They have been hung and well tested
Have you ever had blinds here before?"

A Lassie and Three Dogs

The tale of three dogs and a lassie
And the explosions that came from their chassis
      It splattered the ground
      With a most terrible sound
Now their wiping their bums on the grassy

Mm, Shopping

There was once a georgeous brunette
Whilst shopping broke into a sweat
      Her desire for a new toy
      Gave her palpitations of joy
And her longing to be a duet

~ ~ ~

So in search for her smooth operator
She decides to go for the greater
    "Give me that one on the wall
     It's the best one of all"
Sorry madam, that's the fire extinguisher  

Getting to the Point

The day Wilma went for her injection
The doctor he made a suggestion 
     Please strip to you butt
     And out it must jut
This will save you from getting an infection

So Wilma she sticks out her bottom
This will stop her from feeling so rotten
     His injection he aims
     But it's not quite the same
Injecting he seems to have forgotten

Wee Man

I was born just a little man
I wanted to grow as fast as I can
    Then I started to hurry
    But my mum says " don't worry"
You were born a Leprechaun

In Law I'm an Outlaw

I'm just a typical working bloke
Who went to court for taking a toke
    My brief, my attorney
    And my financial journey
I lost now I'm totally broke


Seasonal Wishing, Kissing

To sit beside her and talk
Even holding hands as we walk
     Sharing seasonal kisses
     Are my dreams and my wishes
Beep beep! damn the darned alarm clock

Too Handy Andy

I went out with a boy called Andy
Whose tipple was Courvoisier Brandy
     He was a typical bloke ~~~
     But whilst drunk, he groped ~~~~
For the Brandy had turned this boy randy

Pickles Trickle to Tickle

My gal has a fetish for pickles
Down my back they sure do trickle
      As she awaits them to roll
      Always reaching their goal
It's more than the pickles that tickle